That's all I can stands....

I can't stands no more.

I'm sitting here looking at the Rolling Stone Top 40 albums. I've got two strong words for the people who buy these albums: Come on!

The first three, I think, are alright. Beyonce, Audioslave, Bob Dylan. Bob Dylan should be number one, but still a top three spot is ok. Then I continue on down the list.

Number four is Danity Kane, who I don't really know who it, although I think it's the group of girls that Puffy Diddy Daddy put together on MTV. So, while its abhorable, it's understandable. But, then at number 5...staring up at the shadow of The Poet Dylan is Cheetah Girls 2, a lovely little modern day tween Monkees. By that, of course, I mean a fake band put together for a TV show. And, just as fascinating as the Monkees success, the FAKE, FICTIONAL "BAND" IS NUMBER FIVE!!!!!!!!!!

Let's continue. Christina and Jessica are number 6 and 7, and while I don't like it, there's always been room for pop music on the charts, and let's face it, those girls can sing.

And then there's number 8. I can't even begin to explain how terrified I am at what this says about our culture. Nickelback. The WNBA of hardrock...it's the same game, but not as fun to watch.

Let's get a big hell yes for Iron Maiden coming in at 9. Let's hit the high spots all at once and cut this short. Outkast, Panic at the Disco, Gnarls Barkley, Chili Peppers, The Roots, and Snow Patrol.

Now, for those of you who do quick math, that's not even half of the top forty. The rest...all crap. Some highlights: Now 22, the compilation of crappy pop music put out by record companies for the sole purpose of making more money and taking more money from the artists. Rascall Flatts, Pussycat Dolls (a vegas strip show act, with less talent), High School Musical (another gift from the Disney corp.), James Blunt, Carrie Underwood (an American Idol demon), Kidz Bop (another absolutely-for-profit project of the record companies), LeToya (who was actually NOT good enough for Destiny's Child) and Tim McGraw (who only still has a carreer because he married the hottest woman on earth).

I repeat, COME ON. Anybody remember when music used to mean something. Remember when it used to say something, to be the soundtrack of a generation, to speak out against the government, to be an exhibit of virtuoso musical talent, to NOT be about the money.

Functionless Art is Tolerated Vandalism.

B