Thursday, August 28, 2008

This Week in "What The...?!?" News

Yo.

Thanks for your comments on the last topic everybody and thanks for your kind, but misinformed, voting on the drummer poll. John Bonham is the best there's ever been and ever will be when it comes to rock drumming. Every one else who beats the skins, from Brad Bryan to Neil Peart, is just trying to play like him.

And now, onto business.

This week the LPGA announced that they were instituting an English language test to be given to all golfers. Hey LPGA, WHAT THE....?!?! This isn't even closet racism, its just racism. Ethnocentrism, arrogance, racism. Pure and simple.

One may wonder why the lady golfers association decided to start this new program. Because, and I want everybody to listen closely to this, too many Korean players are winning championships. Korean women dominate women's golf. Over 60% of tournaments played are won by a Korean woman.

Here's an idea, American golfers who have chosen systemic racism to solve your problem...PLAY BETTER GOLF!

In a sporting world in which the US Open, tennis, is dominated by Russians and the best men's players are Serbian, Spanish and whatever Federer is, in which the US Redeem Team won its gold medal over a Spanish team with four NBA players on its starting lineup and the best players in that league are from the Virgin Islands, Spain, China, Argentina and Canada, yes, Canada and a world that can nominate a half-white-Kansan, half-African, raised-in-Indonesia-and-Hawaii man named Barack for president, the LPGA, instead of globalizing and expanding has gone back in time to 1950s Mississippi. Get with the times LPGA and if you're tired of getting beat by the Koreans...uh, practice, practice, practice.

Flabbergasted,
Brad

ps: no offense meant, but if you still think Barack Obama is a Muslim, then I think you're kind of an idiot. (this is the exact thing Mom warned me about, but come on people!)

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

Question

Either I'm gearing up for another school year, or I have completely lost my mind. Either way, I opened St. Athanasius' book On the Incarnation the other night and read it cover to cover. In it, Athanasius makes the case for the divinity and humanity of Christ, the need for the incarnation and what it means.

Now, I'm an incarnation guy. Some people are baptism people, some focus on the cross, still others on the resurrection. Realizing that they all, of course, go hand in hand, the incarnation is the most important thing Jesus ever did in my opinion.

Like any good doctrine of incarnation, and therefore salvation, one must begin with the NEED of salvation. Why do we need saving? So, a question came to my mind reading Athanasius' account of original sin that lead to the incarnation and the salvation of all.

How does one form a sound doctrine of original sin while denying the act of the original sin itself? In other words, what's original sin without believing in Adam and Eve? And, maybe more important, does it matter?

I pose the question to the blogosphere...

Thanks, B

Monday, August 04, 2008

The Wesley Project

Hey, everybody,

For the past couple of years, I've been writing new tunes to Charles and John Wesley songs from the United Methodist Hymnal. My friend Mark, http://www.stupidityensues.blogspot.com/, found out that this is actually a real thing done by a guy named Carl Thomas Gladstone. Check out http://www.carlthomasgladstone.com/wesleyproject.htm. I wrote mine completely unaware that this was going on, but its pretty cool. My big brother Andy has rewritten quite a few, as well. He says there's usually two types of Charles Wesley hymns, the "fight song" type and the organ opera that's way too hard to sing.

Here's the problem. Modern songs need a chorus. If you want a congregation to be familiar with a song and sing along, the song needs a catchy, easy-to-sing, memorable repeated section. The biz talk for this is the hook. The song needs a hook. Charles Wesley didn't write hooks, he didn't know what they were. So, you've got to find a line within the song to use as a chorus. "Amazing love, how can it be, that thou my God would die for me?" from And Can it Be that I should Gain, is a great chorus.

Another problem is the language. I don't change the thee's and thou's, I kind of like them. But, some words that rhymed when Charles wrote them, don't rhyme any more. And, the line above is actually shouldst die for me, but who wants to sing the word shouldst?

So, here's a little song list that I've got so far.

Maker In Whom We Live: This is the first one I wrote, and it sounds like it. A regular G, C, D praise song.

Thou Hidden Source of Calm Repose: Never heard this one done in its original form. Probably a reason for that. The backward, Yoda speech of this one called for a reggae beat.

Praise to the Lord the Almighty: Not a Wesley song, but I'm pretty proud of this one because it uses not one, but TWO capos (that's right Mustoe, I did it, two capos) Ask your nearest guitar player what a capo is.

Christ Whose Glory Fills the Skies: A Pearl Jam-y slow rocker, needs a full band and a Ryan McLouth lead guitar line.

Jesus, Thy Boundless Love to Me: #183 in the UMC hymnal, a poem translated by John Wesley who called it the cry of his heart. I like this one.

O Love Divine, What Hast Thou Done: A beautiful song about the passion of Christ. Naturally, I did this one as a blues song.

Christ the Lord is Risen Today: A St. Paul favorite and probably the most complex one. Andy, Ron and Joel sat in the back picking out the Pearl Jam section, the Dave Matthews Band part, the U2 bridge. Impossibly high pitched U2 bridge, why do I write music out of my own range?

Depth of Mercy: A clear Jack Johnson rip-off.

And Can It Be That I Should Gain (Amazing Love): The newest one. Just a classic rock song. Needs a full band to really be appreciated.

O For a Heart to Praise My God: An upbeat bluegrassy tune. Needs slide guitar and Mr. Clayton Peak on banjo. Actually had to write a chorus for this one.

Jesus Thine All Victorious Love: A bluegrass ballad. Screams for a fiddle part.

Jesus, United By Thy Grace: This one's for the boys of Blessed. A complete, exact rip-off of our 8-minute, four-chord jam.

I have some other arrangements of non-Wesley tunes: Holy, Holy, Holy. There's Within My Heart a Melody. Psalm 29. For the Beauty of the Earth.

There are passionate, powerful words in our hymnal. But, the music doesn't exactly speak to my generation. Looking forward to sharing these songs with you whenever I can.

Love, Peace and Rock n' Roll,
Brad